you guys were way drunker than both of me
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
