brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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