i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I need mimosas to revive my soul
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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