one might say we're banned from that church
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize