just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
