in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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