handjob tips. give me some.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
