Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
