Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
