Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
