I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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