Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
