I want to have your abortion
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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