You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
