i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
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