haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
