We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
