i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
