He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Randomize
