She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
