you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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