If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
