Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize