You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
You've changed since you got that strap on
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Randomize
