forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Green mimosas i think yes
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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