There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
