I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
