the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
he fucked my hip out of place.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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