I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
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