Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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