Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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