Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
