it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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