Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
