i think i have herpe
just one?
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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