I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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