what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
