no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Randomize