I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
