SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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