in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Vodka?
Forever.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
