so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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