I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
