But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Can Purell be used as lube?
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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