There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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