She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
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