I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Sex in the backyard? Check.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
