After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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