Don't you send me to vm
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize