Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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