it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
